It’s almost time to pull up a chair to the dining table and dig into Thanksgiving meals. Even though they’re hundreds of years in the future, we’d like to think that Starfleet officers should make time for a similarly large communal meal that strengthens the bonds between crew members… followed by plenty of time for napping in quarters after getting filled on the goodies, of course.
To get your mouth watering and, perhaps, to help you prepare your own meal (you can, after all, find all manner of worms here on Earth), here is what a Star Trek Thanksgiving might look like as you share it with other friends from the Beta, Alpha, Gamma, and Delta Quadrants.
No Thanksgiving meal is complete without this Klingon delicacy. Who wouldn’t want to have worm-like creatures crawling all over your plate to start off the meal? Remind your chef to make sure the Gagh is kept alive because no one wants dead Gagh. This meal may not be for everyone, but even if you don’t like it, it’s certainly guaranteed to scare away any in-laws that you don’t want to mingle with!
Cabbage Soup (Andorian)
Make sure you prepare some Andorian Cabbage Soup for your Andorian crewmates! It’s a rare cabbage that can only be found on Andoria. If you need help preparing it, call up the logs from the USS Enterprise NX-1701, where we’re certain a large quantity would have been prepared for Commander Shran’s visits with Captain Jonathan Archer. Other guests at your Thanksgiving meal will probably enjoy this too; I mean, how exotic can cabbage soup be?
Romulan Ale (Romulan)
If you need something to wash down all the food why not go for the hard stuff right away with some Romulan Ale. Even though this is an illegal beverage, you know someone at the dinner table must have some connections to getting some… or just invite your Romulan friend. Be careful though; limit your guests to just one or two glasses of this beverage, otherwise you’ll end up with a rowdy party!
If you’re going a less traditional route with a Thanksgiving brunch, rather than dinner, we’ve got you covered. Let’s throw a dish of Bajoran groatcake on the table. Groat is the grain of a cereal grass cultivated on Bajor — often used as flour for baked goods. It’s a major ingredient in the groatcake, along with a topper of syrup of squill
Regova egg (Cardassian)
Sticking to brunch, here’s a treat for your Cardassian “friend” sitting just down the table from you. Regova Egg, is a Cardassian delicacy. And these yellow and green shelled eggs better be served fresh, otherwise you might start another war with the Cardassians! Cardassian food has been known to be bland or boring, so be sure to keep some seasonings close at hand (perhaps some Kreetassan spice!), or else it might not be for everyone.
Draylaxian whiskey (Draylaxian)
Now that our Romulan Ale is all gone (who drank it all already?), it’s time to open up the next beverage. This time we’re going for the Draylaxian whiskey. Some have even been known to call this drink one of the “galaxy’s real pleasures.” Thankfully your Draylaxian friend even brought two bottles of the beverage, bottled back in the 2150s. Enjoy!
What is a big meal without some Talaxian food, right? Neelix couldn’t join us this time for Thanksgiving, but he was kind enough to drop off a dish of his famous Chadre’kab earlier in the day. He didn’t tell us if it was boiled, baked, stir-fried, steamed, or roasted (the yellow-tinted Talaxian classic meal can be served in all forms), but I guess we’ll find out when we uncover it.
Ok, who invited the Vorta? Well, at least they brought one of their famous dishes made from the fruit Q’lava. No one is entirely sure whether the fruit is poisonous or not (the Vorta are immune to poisons, which comes in handy in their line of work), so your dinner may be about to get very interesting once this course comes around.
Alfarian Hair Pasta (Alfarian)
For the vegetarians dining with us, we’ve been sure to make something specifically for you as well! Yes, you guess it, Alfarian Hair Pasta. Unlike the earth delicacy "Angel Hair Pasta," Alfarian Hair Pasta is made from real hair follicles! In fact, these are some of the best tasting hair follicles anyone has ever tasted from a mature Alfarian. You’ll be lucky to taste them!
Really? This dry, stringy bird is all Earth has to offer? Unfortunately, yes. But, to this turkey’s credit, it’s better than the sandpaper-y bird that your parents, in-laws, and grandparents make. This is the most perfect turkey you will ever find… because it came from the food replicator. It has the perfect amount of both dark and white meat, isn’t dry at all, and has a great, savory flavor. And all it takes to create is a simple command from you.
Cory Dellenbach is an editor for trade magazines and a photographer from Wisconsin. When he isn’t working, you can often find him chowing down on some Gagh or having a glass of Draylaxian whiskey. You can find him at @coryphotog on Twitter or corydellphoto on Instagram.